Your Picture
by LittleMissPerfect1
Summary: Slightly AU. Separated by the distance and their broken hearts, Nathan and Haley are haunted by their memories of each other and the new lives they lead.
1. Prologue: It Was for the Best

**Disclaimer: I don't own One Tree Hill or any of its characters. Hopefully I don't disgrace Mark Schwann's work with my own!**

**Author's Note: This fic was inspired by the Kid Rock and Sheryl Crow duet "Picture". It's funny because I never really liked that song, but I heard it on the radio one day and this storyline hit me. If you've heard the song, you probably already know that this isn't going to be all fluff. I don't particularly like to see my favorite characters in this kind of light, but I just had to write it. Hopefully you'll give it a chance! Constructive criticism or just plain praise is more than welcome! ;)**

Haley had abandoned her husband to pursue a career in music, grimly accepting the ultimatum he had offered if she left. She was to permanently choose between her music and their marriage. If he wasn't going to respect and support her ambition to become a singer, what kind of a husband was he? The way she saw it, maybe he didn't deserve her in the first place. She was finally living the fabulous dream that she had been too terrified to consider ever since she was a little girl dancing and singing in front of her bathroom mirror. So with these thoughts running through her head, she was able to push aside the painful memories of their past and the love that still dominated her heart. It was for the best.

Nathan was left in Tree Hill, rediscovering his bad boy side. The man Haley had inspired him to become simply because she could see the shadow of potential in his eyes, even though she had never tried to push him to change for her benefit, was lost. In his place was the boyish basketball prodigy he had been before his wife had taken a faithful leap into his life. Perhaps he was even ten times worse. Honestly, who did he have to impress? Certainly no one who would have looked at him the way his wife had so long ago. Most girls fell for the image of the sexy bad boy jock, and who was he to disappoint? Besides, they helped him keep his mind off of the one woman who had actually made him feel like he was worth more than just a one night stand. It was for the best.


	2. Living My Life in a Slow Hell

**Disclaimer: I don't own One Tree Hill or any of its characters. Hopefully I don't disgrace Mark Schwann's work with my own!**

**Author's Note: I knew I'd get plenty of complaints if I only provided the itty bitty prologue, so here is the first part of the fic. I'm planning on having a total of four parts, three more on the way. Let me know what you think so far! Constructive criticism or just plain praise is more than welcome! ;)**

Who was laying beside him tonight? Tainting the very bed that he had shared with Haley for such a seemingly short time, and all that it had stood for? It took a large amount of effort to turn his head and look at the skinny blonde lying inches away, the thin bed sheets leaving little to the imagination and her long hair draped across the pillow. He shoved the connection away and tried to remember which girl this was. There were many of them, and it was hard for him to keep track. He racked his brain, searching for her identity; surely it was down there in the dusty corners of his memory somewhere. Tiffany? Ashley? Maybe Chelsey? Well, one of those names typical of the popular crowd of girls; if there was ever an Ashley who wasn't in the running for queen of the school, he was unaware of it. It was like seeing a dog named Spot or Rover, big surprise. He inwardly shrugged. Names meant little to him anyway. What really mattered was filling his bed with something that wouldn't make him feel so small in the world, and being able to pretend that someone might actually care about him. He shifted to stare up at the ceiling and the strips of moonlight slipping through the half-slanted blinds in the window.

He had fallen victim to a miserable routine. His nights were spent at bars and parties picking up the random ladies who couldn't resist his innate Scott charm. Depending on his level of motivation, he may attend a few random classes one day, but usually Tree Hill High School never even crossed his mind. In retrospect, this was probably the better choice because when he actually did drag himself to school, he only got himself into more trouble than even he could talk himself out of. As far as the realm of school was concerned, things had only gone downhill from the day that he had brought liquor to class and boldly commented on the teacher's slutty skirt; several similar outbursts had followed, and in the back of his mind he assumed that the only reason he hadn't been asked to leave permanently was because they all felt sorry for him.

Too many people thought they understood what he was going through, but they didn't. At the end of the day, they were still able to gaze at the sunset without shedding a sorrowful tear, walk by the flower shop without the aroma reminding them of his wife's naturally sweet scent, or especially sit down to watch a basketball game only to be distracted by the broken pieces of their wedding board still lying on the floor. He had become an empty shell, desperately losing the fight to find something to satisfy the intense loneliness inside, knowing it had been a lost cause ever since Taylor had informed him that Haley was really gone. Despite the fact that he was essentially alive, he had died inside that night. At least the others were still really living.

While he ironically needed to drink away his sense before he could steel the nerve to cheat on his wife so easily, girls needed only a glance in his direction to ignite desire. However, the state of the apartment made it seem like a great feat even for Nathan Scott to get a girl to spend the night. Beer bottles cluttered nearly every corner of the small apartment. Every square inch of the living room table was covered with empty boxes of pizza and Chinese take out. He hadn't cleaned out the refrigerator since she had been gone, and nearly all the dishes they owned were sitting in the kitchen sink, coated with crusty layers of food. He had recently deduced himself to eating right out of the box with plastic forks. Haley would be ashamed, but what did that matter now? She wasn't coming back to see any of it anyway. Once again glancing at the stranger sleeping beside him, ensuring that she hadn't been disturbed from her slumber, he quietly reached out for his nightstand drawer. Sliding it open, he dug underneath the pile of dirty socks and worn-out boxers, finally retrieving a small framed picture. He squinted in the darkness, just making out Haley's face beaming up at him and his own grinning figure with his arm around her shoulders. A single tear slid down his cheek as he reflected on their happy past and how much he missed her now.

Despite the fact that he had dozens of girls crooning over his good looks and lined up around the corner just to spend one night with him, he couldn't help but feel utterly alone. Yeah, his new drive in life was to find another who could show him that he was worth something, worth anything, but all the girls he ran with were just as shallow as he pretended to be. He realized that he was still in high school and few were really looking to make a commitment even during their senior year. But once, not so long ago, he had done just that: made a commitment to someone, promised to be with her forever. Of course, that hadn't seemed to matter much in the spur of a moment, and outwardly he acted as if it had been nothing for him as well. He let on that he didn't trust love, and that he never would again, but deep down he knew it wasn't true no matter how much he wanted to deny it. He was still searching for something that would last a lifetime. He wished someone would find him worthy of a real relationship rather than just a romp in the bed. Wasn't there anyone who could see him for who he was, who couldn't stop thinking about him every moment of the day, who could miss the way he smiled or the way his eyes twinkled when he laughed, who could just care about the genuine Nathan Scott just a little bit? He wished he had a girl like that.

Instead, he just had the nameless women who slept in his bed each night. Not like he discouraged it. In a way, he knew it was wrong and that he should put his foot down, but he just couldn't help it. He knew of no other way to get their attention. It wasn't like he was going to walk into the tutoring room and ask for help with his trig homework. Absolutely not. The only option left for him was attending numerous parties and getting trashed before allowing himself to disgrace his long lost marriage with the random chicks that were only looking for one thing from him. And everyone thinks guys are the superficial ones? Nathan snorted in disgust. Please.

The girl beside him shifted in her sleep at the sudden sound that had slipped from his throat, and he caught his breath for a moment. Relief flooded through him as she simply rolled over onto her other side, the sheet slipping a little to reveal the upper half of her back. Something stirred in Nathan at this sight, but with it came the overwhelming sadness that always nagged him when he had such thoughts of other women. He hated the person he had become, so unfaithful and bitter. Any other man probably would have been strong enough to wait forever for Haley, but he was only Nathan Scott; it only proved further that he didn't deserve her and she was better off without him. Gazing at the picture in his hand, he felt like his heart was breaking all over again. The tears came more quickly now, drops falling to the glass of the frame and slightly distorting the picture within. His vision blurred, he gently brought the picture to his lips and kissed Haley's image, muttering a sincere apology under his breath. Then, hastily brushing the tears away, he abruptly shoved the picture back into the depths of his drawer and pushed it close. Turning back over to face the blonde, he moved his body closer to her and draped an arm over her thin frame, closing his eyes as he restlessly tried to find some peace.


End file.
